Contemplations of an Expectant Mommy… (not what you think)

Today is my due date and I’m not convinced that my little princess will make her grand entrance today, so I’m distracting myself with this post.

Often, my blog posts tend to be “lighter” in nature, usually featuring my favourite busy little boy, but this one is a little different. If you were hoping for a light read, you may want to skip this one.

As many women can likely relate too (maybe men, too – what do I know?), I have many, likely hundreds of contemplative thoughts that occupy my mind daily. While isolated, they may seem random, but over time with various life experiences, many form into certain themes and build cohesion. I’m going to share about one such theme that has been banking up time in my brain space over the last while.

This thought train began about a month ago at a prenatal appointment that I had. My doctor was out of town, so I was seeing another Dr in the office. He didn’t know me, so he was briefly going over my file out loud in the room with me. He said, “So, this is your third pregnancy?” and for a moment I was taken a back. I am due to expect our second child any day now, but it’s true, this IS my third pregnancy.  I have thought about the baby we lost a little over a year ago quite often as I’ve journeyed through this pregnancy, but somehow hearing someone say it aloud sounds so strange.

Our miscarriage is not a secret and if you’re interested in reading about it, you can check out this post.

At my last 4 prenatal appointments or so, I’ve been given a page for my records… maybe I’m supposed to take them with me when we go to the hospital??? I should probably inquire about that. Anyway, the page just tracks all of the different tests and checks that women routinely have as they approach their time of delivery. At the top of the page it has my own personal information. My top left corner looks like this:

I don’t know if it’s as glaringly obvious to you as it is to me, but it REALLY bothers me that there is a 1 under that “abortion” column. Why do they use that title??? I had no choice surrounding whether or not my baby from my second pregnancy lived or died. To me, the term “abortion” is reserved for babies that are aborted by their mother’s choice, and I did not choose to have an abortion. I know it’s just a word, but it’s a loaded one.

To carry on with my thought train to the next tangent, I was visiting with my parents a few weeks ago. I shared with them my thoughts (what I’ve just shared with you) and we entered an interesting conversation. “Won’t it be incredible to meet your little baby in heaven one day?” One of my parents said. I don’t actually remember if it was mom or dad who brought it up and truthfully, that’s probably not exactly what they said, but thus began our conversation. One of them raised the topic of what people will be like in heaven. It’s crazy to think of meeting my tiny baby who was only 9 weeks along in pregnancy in heaven. I don’t even know if I was expecting a boy or a girl! We talked about how “old” people will be in heaven, which is a funny topic if you’ve ever thought about it.

The bible talks about heaven being perfect and to be perfect, no one will require care.

Revelation 21:3-4 (NLT)

             I heard a loud shout from the throne, saying, “Look, God’s home is now among his people! He will live with them, and they will be his people. God himself will be with them. He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever.”

We know that we will be given new bodies, but how old do you think those bodies will be???

2 Corinthians 5:1-3 (NLT)

“For we know that when this earthly tent we live in is taken down (that is, when we die and leave this earthly body), we will have a house in heaven, an eternal body made for us by God himself and not by human hands.  We grow weary in our present bodies, and we long to put on our heavenly bodies like new clothing. For we will put on heavenly bodies; we will not be spirits without bodies. While we live in these earthly bodies, we groan and sigh, but it’s not that we want to die and get rid of these bodies that clothe us. Rather, we want to put on our new bodies so that these dying bodies will be swallowed up by life.  God himself has prepared us for this, and as a guarantee he has given us his Holy Spirit.”

It’s reasonable to assume that those who pass away from earth in old withering bodies will be given younger, healthier and more agile bodies to forever use in heaven. Those who die with earthly bodies that have been plagued with disease or disability will be given completely healthy and whole bodies to enjoy forever. I’m guessing my 9 week embryotic (is that a word?) baby will not be given a baby body, for that would make him/her dependant and therefore, imperfect, so it is likely that he/she has been given more of an adult body. Weird!

We debated what age would be the perfect age to forever remain at in heaven. I think it was my dad who said, 30, but I disagreed. I am 30 right now and I don’t have nearly the energy/stamina that I used to have. So, I’m guessing that, in heaven, we get to be somewhere in our early 20’s.

***There are others out there in internet world who have pondered this issue of "how old will I be in heaven." Here's a link to another person's thoughts, if you're interested.

There is, of course, a lot of speculation and guessing within these thoughts I’ve been sharing. I have no proof that everyone is the same age in heaven, nor will I preach that message to the world. It’s just something to think about.

So, there you have it; the crazy and somewhat random contemplations of an expectant mother ON her due date. I hope you’ve been able to follow my train of thought. It doesn’t seem SO random in my mind.

I do hope my little girl decides to come today….

I’m guessing she will look something like this:

This is Jett at about 2 weeks old. Love this boy. Cannot wait to meet my little girl.